Why do we behave the way we do? And then why do we get stuck trying to do personal development work to change those patterns? Even while tapping, we can be judging and shaming ourselves when we don't understand the valid reasons behind our feelings and actions. We think that simply by understanding why we have the patterns we have, or really wanting them to go away as we tap, we'll suddenly and permanently break free from them. But that's not how it works!
When that doesn't work, we think it's a willpower, intelligence or personal worth problem. That's simply not true for anyone. Talking about our problems doesn't lead to change for most people. I want to share with you why that's so.
Real change needs to take place in the body - your body (specifically your nervous system) needs to know it's safe to change.
Imagine that your body is a bustling village, guarded by a watchman that sits up in a tower, always on the lookout for threats. Sometimes, this watchman is announcing threats when none are actually present, because something resembles a threat from the past.
When the watchman sounds the alarm, our "emotional brain" can hijack the show, shutting down our ability to reason, use logic, or even understand that the feelings we're feeling won't last forever.
We may sense that we're acting from fears that may be unfounded, but we still can't get the watchman to chill out.
Words stop coming to us because the language areas of our brain have also shut down. That's why talking about it doesn't fix it. The line has been cut between your words and your heart. It's just gobbledygook to that scared part of you.
You cannot make real decisions, or receive your soul's guidance when you're in a chronic fight-flight-freeze response. You stay stuck in the same old patterns, which leads to more feelings of shame and helplessness.
Yet so many of us do lead most of our lives bouncing between panic and shutdown, relying on willpower and determination to carry on with what needs to be done. Often, we don't even realize it until we are stopped by daily headaches, panic, or crippling fatigue.
EFT tapping can help you rewire the way you respond to stress. It sends a message directly to your watchman and lets it know you're safe. When your emotional brain knows you're safe, your thinking brain comes back online. Now it's finally possible to explore and change our beliefs with compassion and understanding.
EFT tapping lets us make these kinds of changes without using willpower to hold new spaces. We also don't have to dredge up every disturbing memory to clear out the charge of the past. Leading research on trauma and stress supports this view. I do my utmost to stay up to date with life-changing information like this, and I base the work we do on it.
As a result, my clients find they're able to make big, lasting shifts in the way they think and feel. I guide you through this transformation with genuine compassion and respect for your innate wisdom.